Boats, Ranked

sauceboat : They are vessel of ancient Solomon Islanders who charted a now - fantastic journeying 2,000 milesinto the unknown . They check drunk people while idling with the engine go on the East River as the toilet flood the lower deck of cards , penetrating nauseated passenger ’ nostrils with sewage , an case which I can testify has happened at least one time ( July 4th , 2018 ) . They are vehicle of assholes , such as American Commodore Matthew Perry and the Winkelvoss twins . They are machines that disrupt whale vocal . They are scriptural . They are the accelerator forcannibalismandschlocky moviesandthrilling picture . The Jungle Cruise . The Titanic . The Raft of Medusa . Noah ’s Ark. Some of these are ships , I guess . The important question is how do you grade them ?

That ’s such an grand and chaotic range of boat - link example that the only metric to rank them is whether they justify their own being . Here are nine boats that represent the best and worst reasons to be a boat , from worst to best .

BoatHovercraftJames BondNoahShipTransport